People’s Perception

I live 1800 miles from all of my direct family, I have our entire marriage of almost 16 years. My family really doesn’t know my husband, they refuse to come here and we only have been there a handful of times in our marriage. Yet they all have their opinions, they’re entires to them, but they also have given him no credit for being sober for over a year and a half now. Our immediate family and our marriage is doing better than it has in years, but yet they still don’t know or even care to ask.

My mother just gave this lame excuse to me about a friend from high school asking how I was and she said “I didn’t want to tell them about your situation”. What situation, that my husband had a drinking problem, I made him choose me or alcohol and he choose me and has been sober since, I think that is a good thing, not a bad thing!

Too often, we don’t share our problems and we put in a face that everything is ok… I think by doing so, it gives other people in their marriages to think “we” have no struggles in our marriages. Not that all the dirty laundry should be aired out, but truth is important, it helps others know life isn’t perfect and life including married life, we have to work for, great lives & marriages are never given for free, it’s hard work every day and sacrifice! I know some spouses may not have chosen to keep their marriage and family over their addiction before it was too late, I’m lucky mine did, but it’s still work and determination and sacrifice, but mostly work.

I hope this helps someone, that’s struggling in some of the same positions of sobriety….